the amazing body
3 minute read
Samuel...
After a long nap and more ice chips, John was a bit more alert. While he recognized us when he woke up, he still didn't remember where he was or why he was there. We patiently told him again what had happened and why he was in the hospital. His reactions and processing time were very slow and his eyes weren't fully looking straight ahead - they tended to drift up and to the side, and it was the scariest thing to think this might be his new permanent state. He couldn't focus his eyes on anything - they drifted back and forth slowly, as if they couldn't find anything familiar enough to land on. It was like he had been put in slow motion and everything was clearly confusing and new. I tried to swallow the panic that kept rising up in my chest when I thought about what the rest of John's life might be like - what the rest of OUR lives might be with him like this. It was only the first day out of ICU, I kept thinking, things will get better.
His first non-ICU nurse, Julie, was very efficient and after getting his room situated and going over the rules of the floor with us she informed us she was going to have PT come at some point in the afternoon. I didn't really understood why a Physical Therapist would be coming today but I'd learned that the whole hospital world was one I didn't know much about so I just said, "ok," and went back to sitting with John.
A bit later there was a knock on the door and a 30-ish looking man who was no more than 5' 7" or so, but all muscle, entered the room. He was carrying a variety of different apparatus and had what looked like an extra-long seatbelt draped around his neck. He was all business and even though John had nodded off again he looked at us and introduced himself as Samuel, he was there to start physical therapy. I looked at my ex-husband as if Samuel had just told us he was there to put John in the circus...it seemed a little (LOT!) soon to be putting John into a physically demanding situation, but what did I know? My ex had a similar reaction but went to John's bed and gently woke him up. This time we not only had to explain to him where he was and why he was there - but also that he was going to be doing some physical therapy with Samuel. It seemed that at this point nothing was making sense to John anyway so he just stared at this fitness poster-child, eyes drifting up and glazed, and nodded ok.
Samuel was the most interesting combination of tough but gentle, direct but not overbearing, and it was obvious that he'd done this many, many times. He explained to John that he was going to have him sit up and put his feet on the ground. This seemed like a basic task but John had been immobile for four days now, and what was left of his atrophied muscles was minimally-functioning. He was so weak it was exhausting for him just to move around enough for Samuel to get all of his tubes and cords untangled enough for this first attempt at movement.
The mom gene in me wanted to tell this man to leave my son alone, that he'd almost died twice now in the past week and couldn't we just do this in about another week? But I suppressed that urge and stood back in the corner by the sink and got out my phone. One of the ICU nurses had told me I should be taking pictures and video because John wasn't going to remember this - it was the best advice she could've given me because she was right.
Samuel put the long strap that looked like a seatbelt around John's waist and cinched it up tight. He used it to pull John into an upright sitting position and literally had to hold him there as John couldn't keep himself vertical. Samuel held him there and explained how he was going to turn John so that he could lower his feet to the ground. John just looked at him like he couldn't figure out who this guy was or why he was in a hospital bed trying to sit up - we took it slowly and after a painful 10 or 15 minutes John was sitting on the side of the bed with his feet on the floor. It was so incredible to see this that we were almost cheering. Samuel was so pleased with this progress that he asked John if he wanted to try walking. I gasped after just watching the level of ordeal involved to sit up, but John looked at him blankly, and after about 20 seconds of consideration he nodded, yes.